What To Do??

Noe will be SO pissed if I tell him I'm not so sure about being an English teacher. I think I'll enjoy it, and it's an art in a way. I'd just love to be an artist. What a great job. With this thought, it leads me to explain my personal priorities that come up every day, every minute, every second. I guess these are why I can't stand to be productive.

Priorities In My Life:

• Drowning myself in things that make me happy
• Exploring my mind & imagination
• Learning so that my mind & imagination can be expanded

I'm afraid that I'm not sticking to what I need.

I wish I could fall asleep and wake up in the place & state of mind I need to be in. Instead I'm just some sobbing wench dealing with Aunt Flo being around for now.

A fear of mine is that I'm going to really go through with something I want to do, and that'll lead me to only God knows where. I'm afraid I'll end up going to art school somewhere in a big city, and I'll try my darndest to become this sophisto artist (hey, look that rhymed!). I'm afraid that I won't mind working shitty jobs until I get my big break. I'm honestly afraid of that. I'm afraid of what could make me happy.

I'm almost 22. I should know what I want to be when I grow up by now.